There are plenty of people who are good at picking upgirls...but they aren't good at explaining what they do. Don't foolyourself into thinking that you're either destined to be good withgirls, or you aren't. This is a skill anyone can learn.Part 1 - Steps- Girls are everywhere! Don't get sucked in to thinking that youcan only find girls to date when you're out at a party or at thebar. They're on the street, in a store, in class, everywhere yougo. Just go out into the world and pay closer attention.
- Go talk to her! There's a guy named Mystery who came up withsomething called the 3 second rule. Pretty much, what it says is,if you see a girl you think is cute, three seconds after you thinkthat, you should go up and start talking to her.
- What to say. Guys are tripped up by this all the time. A goodplace to start is by using what's called a "neutral-opinionopener." What that means is you ask her a question about somethingthat has nothing to do with you. It can be simple ("What do youthink of this place?") or elaborate ("Did you see the fightoutside? There were these two girls, and they were totally fightingover this guy...but the guy was really scrawny and wimpylooking...it was crazy..." but it really doesn't matter what yousay.
- IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOU SAY!! Girls (especially hot girls)get hit on almost every day, and they know why you came up to talkto them. Whoever this girl is isn't paying as much attention towhat you're saying as she is to the way you're saying it (are youconfident? comfortable? Are your shoulders hunched over, or back?)Do your best to appear comfortable, and she'll feel comfortabletoo. She's looking for a guy who is calm, cool, and in control...sobe that guy
- Do something novel. A really pretty girl has people telling herall the time how hot she is, how cute she is, how nice she is...andshe's gotten used to it. If you become the next guy to come up andtell her how pretty she is, she'll appreciate the compliment, butshe won't date you. I'm ***NOT*** saying to be mean...but youshould be more casual. Make a little joke at her expense..notsomething huge or insulting (David DeAngelo would say somethinglike "Wow, that's a big purse! Do you have a gun in there?" or ifshe's dressed up "I like your shoes...they look reallycomfortable") Not anything about her appearance, though..that'sjust mean.
- Just be yourself! If you've ever asked a girl what to do tomeet a girl, she'll probably say "just be yourself." You may thinkthat means that if you feel nervous, and that you want to tell heragain how pretty she is (for the 40th time) that you should...butthat's NOT what she means. She means to treat her normally...almostlike one of your guy friends. If you're at the bar, and she asksyou to get her a napkin...she's probably just asking to see ifyou'll jump through a hoop for her. Don't do it! You wouldn't breakyour back to do that for one of your good friends...don't treat herdifferently!
- Keep up the banter Once you're talking, keep it up. You maywant to come up with some stories about you that are funny orinteresting, or that display an interesting side to you. Try to notfall into the interview technique (asking things like: What do youdo? Where do you live? Where did you go to school? If you're stuck,turn those interview questions into statements, like "You look likeyou're from New York" or "I bet you're an event planner")
- Ask for her number! After a few minutes, if you're having agood time, cut things off on a high note, and ask for her number.Say that you're having a great time, but you need to get back toyour friends (or whatever else you were about to do before youstarted talking to her). If she says she doesn't want to give youher number, you can joke with her and say that you promise to onlycall her 50 times a day, but that's all. You could also just gether email address (almost everyone has one, and is OK with handingit out, especially for a charming guy like yourself)
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